I recently made the decision to take a retail job close to home. It was a big change from the corporate and executive positions I have held in the past.
This was a huge decision but I made the choice because I wanted to continue working on establishing an online business. In the big picture of my new life, this entry level position accomplishes what a corporate position cannot even offer.
As a food addict, I didn’t want to think of the stress I was heading into. How could I survive? I could see myself binging and stressing as I dealt with new tasks that require manual dexterity. My life would be very different.
And then something miraculous happened to put things in perspective. I found myself right in the moment, focusing on what was important at that time, including when I had to eat. I did my work in the moment. I ate when I was supposed to, on time.
Whatever I was doing at the moment had 100% of my attention without the double-edged sword of multi-tasking hanging over my head. And the world didn’t stop.
My managers don’t bully me. My co-workers smile and speak kindly. They help me learn and they respect me. At the end of the day, I have accomplished something by my own standards as well as those of others.
The first night I ate for four hours straight while listening to “poor you’s” from former networking buddies who offered to do whatever they could to help me get back to where I was.
But when I thought about it–no. I passed that turnoff for a reason, and I’m moving on. I don’t want to go back to a place where I was always hungry, starving for something and substituting food for what I really wanted.
I believe it was Sir Winston Churchill who once said that it is not always enough to do your best, that sometimes one must do what is required. When you step up to the plate, you can also step away from the plate.
Food has a role in my survival but only to provide me with the energy I need to live a productive and healthy life. For the past several days since I started this job, I have only craved food when I went too long without eating.
I find myself adamantly refusing to eat junk food or snack food during that small, off-the-clock lunch window. Out loud I say, “I need real food; I want real food.”
With huge changes occuring in my life, my stress level is lower than it has been in decades. The food addictions bother me less than when I encountered what now seem to be the least little frustrations.
Does that mean I’ll never binge again, that I will banish my food addiction forever? I doubt it, but for the moment, who cares? Forget one day at a time. I’ll take one moment at a time. That I can handle.
Maybe overcoming the emotional eating urges and the food addictions is all about living and in the moment and doing what is required. Can it be possibly that simple?
I don’t know. Don’t sweat the small stuff and let’s find out.